Lesson Learned

I'm so tired of this...

All I can think is that I must have been a horrible person in a past life to have to deal with some of this stuff that's going on. I'm so tired of my feelings being tossed aside, or trampled on in this case. I'm so hurting so much right now, I don't want to deal with anything anymore.  I'm so sick of opening up to someone, only to be casually disregarded. I never thought my 'strength' would be such a detriment, but what was I to do? Stay the way I was, and be abused?

Lately, I've learned that, no matter what, you cannot trust anyone. This is a lesson I feel I've finally learned in it's entirety. Things will never be the same, and I hope this person knows that. There are consequences to our actions, and the consequences to this person's action may have resulted in the loss of a friendship.

I lose everyone, so I don't understand why this is so hard for me. Maybe because I thought things would be different this time. I suppose I was wrong.

No, there's no 'supposing' about it.

I was extraordinarily wrong, even for me.

I don't understand what's so wrong with me. Why don't people stick around with me? I try to be considerate, I care (sometimes too much), I just...I just don't know.

I don't know anymore.

Don't bother with this, I'm just rambling. I'm too upset to come up with much of anything coherent.